In 2002, American superstar rap artist, Nelly teamed up with R&B legend Kelly Rowland and published a song called Dilemma.

The song, and accompanying video, tells a story of a married women, represented by Kelly, and a slick bachelor, represented by Nelly, who develop deep feelings for each other. No matter what Kelly does, all she can do is “think about is [Nelly]”. Even when she’s with her “boo”. She is just simply crazy about Nelly. Nelly, on the other hand, is not the type to “break up a happy home”, but the connection he feels to Kelly is just too strong and he just can’t leave his “baby girl” alone.

A classic infidelity ballad.

What is however very peculiar is not the song itself, but rather the moral outcry that followed a decade years later. The moral data-science police, in particular, went apeshit on Twitter. Not over the affair, that did not interest them, but over the fact that when texting Nelly, Kelly did not use the built in SMS software of her NOKIA phone, but rather opted for the less conventional tool for sending text messages, MS Excel.

Fair enough. It is not the most conventional tool to send text messages from, but at some point I felt the criticism had become unfair. As it was some physical impossibility, violation of the laws of nature, to send a text message from MS Excel.

So, I set out to prove them all wrong. In fact, it is fairly easy to do. Just look at the evidence, a Twitter DM I sent to my brother using MS Excel.